1. |
Helltown - Oxnard
03:18
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It’s the place that you grew up in
the sound of the sea
Your dad’s house in the summer
Was heaven to me
We slept in the spare room
Fell quickly asleep
To the currents of the ocean
And the chaos its breathes
Those flashing lights
Carnival rides
Everybody goes in
But I’ll stay outside
In the lapping of the waves
I’ll wait for your call
Remembering the summer
Before I fade into the fall
It’s all of those used car lots
And their broken dreams
The pier that you jumped off of
To feel like drowning
In something other than the sadness that you bare
Like the coat you hung up
When we got home
I was just scared and we were just fucked
Sitting on the shore
We barely said a word
I was heartbroken, but I didn’t know you were that hurt.
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2. |
Warm Thoughts - The Pier
03:16
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THE PIER COLLAPSED. IT’S STRUCTURAL INTEGRITY WAS COMPROMISED BY THE SEA. THE BEACH WAS CLOSED. THEY FOUND HYPODERMIC NEEDLES IN THE SAND. THEY NEVER BUFFED IT OUT, THE HOMOPHOBIC TAGGING ON THE NORTH SIDE OF THE JETTY. I’M NOT AT PEACE. I MISPLACED MY VIRGINITY SOMEWHERE ON THAT BEACH. HOW CAN YOU ROMANTICIZE THE BEACH? AND WHY WOULD YOU SPEND YOUR TIME THERE EVERY WEEK?
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3. |
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november 12, 2016
if everything i said was met with
silence of first degree
don't you think it might be better
to cut down this olive tree
what will it take for you to
hear the words i can't speak
you know i'll just misconstrue your
silence for harsh critique
why do i need a reason
to be polite
where's the breeze in
the air tonight
won't you leave
right before my eyes
need a reason
why do i need a reason
to stay the night
i don't believe in
your candlelight
you fell asleep
right before my eyes
i need a reason
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4. |
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shadowed clouds and winded clothes
water is nearing I suppose
clapping of the distant north
echoing beside me more
the storm is greater than the man
clouds that sized up to the land
puddles unearthing as they spread
water collapsing to my head
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5. |
rusty - Blue
01:25
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are you too much for me?
am I too much for you to?
living out by the ocean,
makes your outlook oh so blue
I had my eyes all over you,
I was on the prowl for something new.
Grip tight, waste high I pulled you in,
figure of speech left me with just the wind.
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6. |
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A din of celebration,
Pervades the air,
But I am unaware.
Back turned to The Waterfront.
Voices floating all around.
Free of mind, free of flight.
Lost in a thought, I know that she wrote.
A drink in hand, gazing upwards.
She descends starborn from the edge.
'Stay black, Endless Night,' she whispers.
Turning an embrace to open lilting stars.
I'm wrapped in envy of all that eclipses.
She disappears into the sky, I'm emptied.
'Stay black, Endless Night,'
I thought, as I drifted off.
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7. |
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what am i supposed to do
when it rains even in summer
it just snowed all winter,
guess i'll never leave my room
never been the kind of type
to make too many moves,
so when i blame it on the weather,
you know it's only an excuse
guess i'll wait, guess i'll wait
wait for you to say come over
even if i wanna go over i won't let you know i do
guess i'll wait for you to say
that you want me to go over
every time you want me over i'm surprised you do,
that you do
i planned the perfect day
picnic in the park and
before you can say it
i know it's a cliche
but now, i'm sitting at the window
in my underwear, watching the the thunderstorm
and you're,
you're nowhere near
guess i'll wait, guess i'll wait
wait for you to say come over
even if i wanna go over i won't let you know i do
guess i'll wait for you to say
that you want me to go over
every time you want me over i'm surprised you do,
that you do
do do DEdodO doDe da dooododod
guess i'll wait, guess i'll wait
wait for you to say come over
even if i wanna go over i won't let you know i do
guess i'll wait for you to say
that you want me to go over
every time you want me over i'm surprised you do,
that you do
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8. |
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The light's filtering out, but I'm still feeling calm, even as I dove deeper than before.
(The tide rolled on)
I insisted that I stay, but the tide went on.
(The tide rolled on)
Sun's rays edged off; with the depths I wished to remain, but the tide went on.
I swam to find-- it's not important
...
The thought of floating on and drowning in my skin again.
Reef of hopes to bleach; whisking emotions from ebbing veins.
The light's out but I'm calm, even though...
(The tide rolled on)
I insisted that I stay, but the tide went on.
(The tide rolled on)
With the depths I wished to remain, but the tide went on.
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9. |
Dowsing - Get Weird
03:06
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If it’s a matter of preference I prefer your apartment
And the shadows cast on the white walls.
There’s just a lack of commitment and misunderstanding
And the notion that I will never be enough.
And it gets weird sometimes when I say I love you.
Come on don’t leave me hanging on
Don’t leave me.
But it gets weird sometimes when I say I love you
And it gets weird sometimes when I say I love you.
It’s the size of an ocean
It’s fucking terrifying
To be so exposed it feels like I’m drowning.
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10. |
Beach Bunny - Waves
04:26
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I, didn’t know, ‘goodbye’ meant ‘hello’
You’d be right there, you’d be right there
And I, didn’t know, when you’d up and go
You’d be right back, you’d be right back
Your mind was the tide, pulling me under
There’s chlorine in my eyes, couldn’t see under the water
Though I have cried, pools of watercolor
These tears have dried, but I still remember your face
When there was waves & waves and waves of you
there was waves & waves & waves & waves of you
& there was waves & waves & waves & waves of you
& there was waves & waves & waves & waves & waves of you
I didn’t know, couldn’t let it go
You’d be right there, you’d be right there
I didn’t know, when you’re feeling low
You’d be right back, You’d be right back
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11. |
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12. |
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Holding on to one thing
I stood open-faced beholding
The mess before my eyes
And the more of its unfolding
Krishna to the good girls
Don't let the shadows fool you
The tighter you hold onto
The less you can maneuver
Six days swimming
No one know where
The rain moved you downstream
Lost in a long green stare
I'll see you in September
When your hair's grown long
Telluride to Denver
Your fear is moving on
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13. |
I Hate Sex - No Exit
02:36
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each grain of sand makes the loudest thud
i’m losing you faster than i thought i would
you’re ice that’s melted into what i can’t hold
you’re the change in my pocket, keeping me weighted, but lately you’re bringing me down
i was the right size to fill a void in your life; you’re the casket door closing on mine
i swear, i’ll have the coins for charon this time
it’s emptying to watch your dreams be poured into another cup
i haven’t had a safe mind in a while, you smashed my limbs together and i found out that was the easiest way to suicide. when I ask you to take me back to the water, please hold me under.
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14. |
football, etc. - Save
03:14
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you’re coming into shore
i’m drifting out to sea
but you can’t save me
and if you were a ship
i’d be drowning in your wake
i think that I forgot how to swim
my feet are touching ground
and they begin to bleed
but you can’t save me
and if you were a ship
i’d be drowning in your wake
i think that I forgot how to swim
forgot to swim
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15. |
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I feel it in my chest each night when I can't sleep
Feels like I'm drowning and I can't breathe
And this is the hardest part
Because everything was all my fault
But I'm too scared to ask for help
So I just Isolate my self
So I just Isolate my self
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16. |
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it's rainin' in Avondale
and she's all alone
her streets are all empty and her bars are all closed
she's cryin' on a sofa for a love she once knew
oh a love so tender yeah a love like you
oh wont you please come home
to these lonely streets
oh wont you please come home
to where you made those memories
the band strikes a chord in the other room
and it resonates a little to hard yeah a little to hard with you
now your tears are rolling down the side walk and your shadow is leavin' without you
guess its true what they say even bloods get the blues
now those street lights don't shine as bright as they use to
and you can never buy enough drugs to feel like you use to
guess that's a cold fact of life or something like that
couse when you lose something good it's hard to get it back
I know that your battered yeah battered and brused
but wont you fight for her love like you use to
couse those other cities they'll try to put you down
but right here in Birmingham it's nice just have you around!
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17. |
Rose Farrington - Tight
02:06
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What's anyone to do
When stomachs get tight
And eyes drupe down
You won't remember the details anyhow
What's anyone to do
When tongues bear down
And days drift in twos
You can't speak and no one will save you
You can't swim and nobody's with you
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18. |
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We slept in the mouth of old friends,
and I'm happy living like river kids.
We'll be here in our tomby sleep,
going back to the place we left our feet.
Could you get some matches?
I'll probably burn them, because I can't drive,
and I need something to pass the time.
I don't need any more.
I'm waking up all bleary eyed,
and I am wondering where I should lie.
Because this couch is making my head feel sore,
watching my best friend vomit through the door.
Rinsing his mouth out in the sink
telling me this is the last time we drink.
Let's just pass out and forget
our bodies could use the rest.
Come with me, I promise the water is fine.
I need something else to convince me I won't die.
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19. |
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So I found our old haunts
where I never thought I'd be alone,
well I got what I wanted,
how wrong I was to wish such a thing.
Now I escape to those places
to get away from the grey
and the piles of reasons
to stay.
There are better things to do,
more valiant roles to take,
I'd talk to you if only I knew what to say,
it's the chemicals in my brain.
I'm drying up but I'm soaked to the bone.
I'll stand on my rock
wishing to scream
(Leave me alone)
but I'm too fucking pathetic
(I'm all alone)
so I'll choke on my words
and bury my head in the sand.
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20. |
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City lights blurring by.
Equipped with roses, suit, and tie.
Her smile brightens up the room,
But I'm content to writhe in gloom.
She glares with contemplative lust.
The hinges of my smile rust.
Crossing Freeways In The Rain.
But she takes me to entertain.
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21. |
Lemuria - Lake Below
02:29
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Airplanes, birds and my heart fly in cursive
Life together easily unrolled like a valuable rug
Dead leaves fall and carpet the lake below
They’ll have to catch up later, we’re tired of waiting
But by then we’ll have floated somewhere else
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22. |
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the lightning flared, and the clouds kept getting darker
we had no raincoats on, we started running
and the jig was up, my words kept getting louder
you started slowing down, it started pouring
settle down, it's just water
the weeping of the skyline
could I be more like you?
and not be so afraid of what's headed our way,
I just keep staring in space
you wrapped your arms around me like a mother,
I just stopped talking, and we were quiet,
I don't see the harm in falling over someone,
must be too stubborn for us to try it
settle down, it's just water
the weeping of the skyline
could I be more like you?
and not be so afraid of what's headed our way,
I just keep staring in space
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23. |
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THIS IS WATER:
the space in my head that I occupy
the freewill you lost / the truth I deny
I fear my adjustments won't keep going well
I'll end up in my own kind of childhood hell
tossing & turning
longing & yearning
for more chances to take
and more choices to make
I am up late into the night retelling myself everything I didn't do, everything I didn't say
and I hear your voice being honest with me / flooding my mind
and you keep saying something but I can't make it out
it's lost in the thoughts that push down & drown
and it's all ruined.
and it's all ruined because of the substance that fills my head:
THIS IS WATER
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